An Assassin Story

2005-10-04T13:33:00.000-07:00

Victim: Cynthia Lin
Time of death: 3:10 pm, Tuesday, 9/27/05
Murder weapon: Neon-green water PPK
Cause of death: drive-by shooting

Cynthia Lin, having been previously shot in the left shoulder and killed in the parking lot at 3:30 pm on the afternoon of 9/22/05 was resurrected the following morning at 11:06 am by Priest Hattox. On the day of her death, Lin walked out of the Reynolds Building next to her assassin, yet calmly held back under the breezeway as her assassin left, unlocked his vehicle from the bicycle rack, and rode off to the east emitting shouts of good luck in studying for the next day's anatomy exam. After he rode off into the distance, she left the shelter of the breezeway in a non-hurried walk toward her car parked in Lot 74. Unbeknownst to her, her assassin's vehicle made a U-turn at Olsen Road, and cut across the sidwalks over toward the Wehner Building. Suddenly the assassin drove up behind her left side, and caught her in a stream of bullets that splayed from her occipital bone anteriorly to the maxilla. The assassin turned around and drove away in haste.

2005-10-01T22:08:00.000-07:00

Name: David "Phammy" Pham
Time of Death: approximately 9:30 pm
Place of death: Barnes and Noble on Texas Ave.
How it happened: Since David Pham NEVER leaves school or the LRU, the assassin had a hard time scheming when she would kill her victim. She called the victim and pretended like she needed his help "studying for genetics", and met him at the bookstore. She asked him some questions about genetics to make her visit seem legitimate. As she was preparing to leave, she began talking to a mutual friend sitting near by. Suddenly, she pulled out her gun and began to shoot, however, the gun malfunctioned as if it had no ammo. Eventually the gun came through and shot David Pham in the upper right quadrant of his abdomen around T12. In the mayhem, an innocent bystander sitting right behind David reading an unpurchased book, was shot as the "bullets" skimmed past David (and she didnt seem to happy about it). Witnesses include Sally Bullock and her two roommates, David's beloved girlfriend Kristin, and Jon Minor. He was survived by Mr. and Mrs. Phammy in Lake Jackson. Phammy was a good man, but not good enough to escape his assassin. I guess it turns out that he was just too smart for his own good!! The assassin has a new target now and he/she better watch their back, or in Phammy's case their front!

2005-09-19T17:44:00.000-07:00

Name: David Burkholder
Time of death: 12:03 p.m.
Cause of Death: Shot in the back by Emily Ogden. Ruled a crime of passion, no charges were pressed.
Epitaph: Here lies the body of David Burkholder. He wouldn't be dead if he'd looked over his shoulder. (Or if Heath hadn't lent Emily his gun...older)

2005-09-17T07:06:00.000-07:00

Q: Do we have to wear the shower caps on our heads?
A: Well, Kyle Fehlis, I'm not sure where YOU wear a shower cap, but the general populace seems to concur that the top of your head is the accepted location for a shower cap. Please, folks, no "but I've got a shower cap in my pants!" protests.

2005-09-15T20:09:00.000-07:00

The Basics of Assassins
Who: you, and you're never really sure who else...

Your mission: attempt to "assassinate" your target by shooting him or her with a water gun

Where: anywhere but Reynolds Medical Building, the Medical Sciences Library Building, and the breezeway that connects them. Once you're out from under that sheltering passageway, though, you'd better watch your back.

When: starting Monday, September 19.

Why: because you need something to take your mind off studying!

FAQs:
Q: Gee Laura, how do I know who my target is?
A: You'll be getting your targets by email on Monday.

Q: What happens when I annihilate my first target?
A: When you whack your first target, he will divulge who HIS target was, and you shall assume that person. PLEASE let me know so I can have a running tally of who is still in the game.

Q: Can I neutralize my assassin?
A: Yes. If your assassin attempts to take you out, but you have the fastest guns in the west and shoot him first, he is neutralized for the next 24 hours.

Q: Say I want to take my significant other out for a nice dinner, and don't want to be constantly looking over my shoulder for some suspicious character... is there any way I can be safe for a while?
A: Of course! Every target worth his salt has a bulletproof vest! And since your assault weapon is a water gun, it's only fitting that your bulletproof vest is... A SHOWER CAP! That's right. I saw a really cute pastel pink one at Walmart the other day for $0.99. That is, if you're into wearing pink (cough.tyjordan.cough)...

Q: What is this whole blog thing about?
A: You will discover, grasshopper, that HILARIOUS things happen while playing this game. I, for one, have been known to go jogging in my shower cap to make sure I didn't get assassinated. The blog is just an awesome way for us to share great stories about the way we knocked off our classmates (plus, it's a SUPER tool for procrastination).

Q: When will all this insanity end?
A: Last man standing, folks, last man standing. And yes, there will be a prize.

Email me (LEHattox@medicine.tamu.edu) by Sunday at midnight if you DO NOT want to play.